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Last year I went with two of my friends to hear a talk by Steve Biddulph titled ‘Raising Girls’ hoping to gain some nuggets of wisdom on how to be a semi decent mum to my two little girls. Whilst there Steve spoke of how each family has their own dance; that what works for some people won’t work for others and how it’s important to discover your own family’s dance. I was reminded of this recently and it made begin thinking beyond just a family’s dance but how each one of us has our own dance that we are dancing. It is easy to judge someone else’s actions or lack of actions and compare them to our own but maybe we should begin to view everyone else’s actions as a step to their own dance.

Each type of dance has it’s own style; its own rhythm; it’s own unique vibe. In the same way so do our lives. Sometimes our lives follow the steps of a ballet; elegant, graceful and smooth; other times they seem more haphazard and all over the place like freestyle break dance.

If we are in a season of ballet and look over to our neighbour who is in a season of hip-hop it’s likely to appear to us as though they have got all the steps completely wrong and out of time when in fact they are simply dancing a different dance with a different beat, rhythm and tune. Or we can do the opposite and look over at our neighbour and assume we are doing completely the wrong steps fearing we are getting it all wrong. However what we really should be doing is focusing on our own dance; the dance that suits our time of life; the dance that suits our style; the dance that brings great joy – the dance that God has lead us into.

Sometimes as a mother and wife I dance around the house (quite literally at times) to my own tune and become frustrated as those I live with; my children and husband; don’t seem to be following the same tune or they simply keep getting the steps wrong. In fact very rarely do I find a time when we are all following the same dance routine. I suddenly realised recently that it’s not them getting the steps wrong but me assuming they should be following the same routine as me. Therefore should I start to try and dance their dance; listen to their tune; find the beat in their rhythm? No! I should be discovering, focusing and paying attention to the music in my own life.  My husband may well be my partner in life; a person to trust; to dream with; to work with; to have fun with but he shouldn’t be my dance partner in life. My true dance partner in life needs to be God; he’s the one who sets the pace, the tempo of the music of my life; he is the one who leads my steps ensuring I don’t fall; he’s the one who knows when it’s time to take a pause; he’s the one who knows when it’s time to change the dance and learn something new.

Our lives become hard and tiring when we attempt to dance to our own music; when we try to create our own dance – with our own rhythm or even try to copy someone else’s dance. God has not called us to dance on our own or to dance someone else’s dance; He’s called us to be His unique dance partner; someone who will follow His lead and enjoy the time spent with Him.

A song by ‘Bethel Music’ called ‘We Dance’ has the lyrics:

You steady me Slow and sweet, we sway Take the lead and I will follow Finally ready now To close my eyes and just believe That You won’t lead me Where You don’t go
When my faith gets tired And my hope seems lost You spin me round and round And remind me of that song The one You wrote for me And we dance

These words are a great reminder that when we turn our focus to God and allow Him to take the lead in our lives we can be sure that he will always be with us leading us. If we face times where we lose hope or our faith seems hard to keep hold of we can turn to Him and he will remind us that He is right there with us being our dance partner and writing the songs of our lives.

What kind of dance are you dancing? Is it to God’s song or your own?

Listen to Bethel Music here: